


When a Stranger Flushes the Toilet

by pupeez4eva



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen, Humor, SERIOUSLY random
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 14:59:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14523147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pupeez4eva/pseuds/pupeez4eva
Summary: After watching 'When a Stranger Calls' with Japan, America thinks he hears the toilet flush. But they're the only ones in the house, so that can't be possible...right?





	When a Stranger Flushes the Toilet

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fic ages ago (first Hetalia fic I ever wrote and posted on ff.net) and I finally got around to uploading it here. Hopefully you enjoy! The grammar/writing style isn't as good as some of my more recent stories, but I tried fixing some of it up so it's not AS bad as it used to be haha.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" America wailed, staring at the television screen with wide, horrified eyes. "That was the scariest movie ever...why did we watch it, why?"

Japan stared at him blankly. "Is that a joke? You actually found this movie scary?"

America let out another wail.

Japan sighed and closed his eyes.

"Why did you let me watch that movie?!"

"I told you not to," Japan said. "You just didn't listen."

"Thats a dumb excuse," moaned America. "Besides I didn't think the movie was going to be scary..."

"It's called 'When a Stranger Calls.' What did you think it was going to be?" Japan shook his head. "Although the movie wasn't scary...at all."

America opened his mouth to reply, but then paled and jumped in his seat.

"Oh my god!" he cried. "The toilet just flushed! How could the toilet flush if we're the only ones in the house? There's someone else here!"

"The toilet didn't flush," Japan said slowly.

"Well something sure did," America retorted, "and my bets are on the toilet. Oh, Kiku, what are we going to do?"

"America-san, I'm certain that there is no one in the house. We are the only ones here -"

The phone began to ring. America let out a startled squeak.

"It's okay," Japan soothed. "It's just the phone."

America let out a strangled laugh. "Yeah, that's what Jill thought in the movie...until she picked it up."

"It's just a movie," Japan said. "It's not real."

He began to reach for the phone. America yelped and reached out to slap his hand away. "Are you insane?" he snapped. "Are you even listening to me? Pick up the phone and it'll be like the movie all over again! And then we'll all die!"

"Jill never died," Japan pointed out.

"Yeah, but she went crazy! I'm the hero! Hero's can't be crazy! How can I save the world if I'm locked up in some nut house?"

Japan stared at him for a moment. Then he picked up the phone.

"Nooooooo!" America wailed. "You've doomed us all! We'll never make it out of this house alive! Why, Kiku,  _why?"_

"Hello?" Japan paused and listened for a moment. He shot America a pointed look, before saying, "Hello England."

America snorted. "Oh  _yeah right._ You expect me to believe that it's  _England_ on the phone? Oh what a laugh. That stranger guy has you falling for his tricks, Kiku. Well I won't allow it! Because I'm the hero and I always save the day!" America stared at the phone for a moment, and then his face crumpled. "Put the phone down, put the phone down,  _put the phone down!"_

There was a moment of silence. "...England wants to talk to you," Japan said at last.

"I'm not falling for that!" America snapped. "It's not England! It's the stranger tricking you into believing that it's England so that you'll fall for his tricks, and then he'll strike when we least expect it..."

Japan shoved the phone near America's ear.

"Shut the hell up you Git," England's voice sounded from the receiver. America paused, blinking in confusion at the phone.

"...England?" he said, hesitantly.

"Idiot," England grumbled. The next thing America heard was the sound of beeping as England hung up the phone. America handed it back to Japan.

"Yup," he said, nodding. "I knew it. It was England."

Japan slapped his forehead.

The toilet flushed.

Both nations jumped up in alarm. America let out a startled squeak of horror and Japan paled.

"H-huh?" Japan stuttered.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" America cried. "There's someone in the house! I knew that guy on the phone wasn't really England!"

"It was England!" Japan snapped, his voice raising in panic.

"Then why is there someone in the house?"

"I don't know!"

The sound of footsteps echoed through the room as someone walked downstairs. America let out a hysterical scream. Japan joined him.

A dark silhouette soon stood in the doorway of the room.

"Take him first!" America screamed, shoving Japan forward.

_"Hey!"_

The lights turned on. Both America and Japan screamed when they caught sight of the unfamiliar figure standing in front of them.

"What are you guys screaming about?" the stranger asked, looking confused.

"Who are you? How did you get in here?" Japan asked in a shaky voice.

"What did you mean, how did I get here?" The stranger frowned. "I was here the whole time."

"I knew it!" America cried, pointing shakily at him. "It's just like in the movie! And now he's going to kill us!"

"I thought Jill went crazy at the end of the movie?" the stranger said. "She didn't die."

America paled, his eyes widening in horror. "HE WAS WATCHING THE MOVIE WITH US! He was hiding somewhere and watching the movie with us! He could have killed us in the dark, and we wouldn't have even known!"

"What are you  _talking_ about?" The stranger now sounded annoyed. "I was sitting next to you the whole time!"

America let out a scream of horror. "The stranger's a ghost. Oh my god, Kiku, save me!"

Japan ignored him. "Who are you?" 

The stranger stared at Japan, and then he glanced at America. His eyes widened in disbelief. "Oh you've got to be kidding me! You guys forgot about me again?"

"What are you talking about?" America wailed. "We don't even know you!"

_"I'M CANADA!"_

America glared. "Is that supposed to mean something? Who the hell is 'Canada?' What does 'Canada' even mean?"

"Canada..." Japan looked thoughtful. "It sounds familiar...hmmm...no. No, I don't think I know anyone named 'Canada.'"

"I'm your brother, for God's sake!" Canada snapped, glaring at America in frustration.

"My brother's name is  _Mattie_ not  _Canada,"_ America retorted. Canada gritted his teeth.

"That's me you  _idiot."_

America stared at him for a moment. Then a smile broke out across his face.

"Mattie!" he exclaimed. "Well why didn't you just say so? Hey Kiku, you know Mattie, right?"

"Oh course, of course." 

America beamed. "So, _you_ were the one who flushed the toilet those two times. You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Two times?" Canada looked confused. "I only went to the toilet once, just now."

America stared at him with wide eyes. "Y-you didn't flush the toilet the first time?" 

"No one flushed the toilet the first time," Japan soothed. "Trust me, I didn't hear anything."

"Me neither," Canada said.

"How would you know?" America retorted. "You weren't even here!"

Canada stared at him. "You know what? I give up."

"Look, the point is," Japan said, "we are the only ones in the house. There is no one else here -"

And then the toilet flushed again.

"...Or not."

Canada shot an odd look at the doorway. "Whoever it is," he said, "they sure seem to have a serious bladder problem."

America screamed in response.

  


 


End file.
